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Saturday
Oct132007
More than the day before
October 13, 2007
It is morning and I am writing with a little head snuggled into my shoulder. The other two kids are still in bed. Incense is thick in the air.  I have begun the practice of burning incense while I pray in the mornings, in the dark, to see the rising smoke and know that God hears my little words.Â
Kid A sits beside me, he scratches his neck, where he still gets eczema, from time to time, especially if I am not careful enough with his diet. I remember how overwhelmed I was by feeding three kids with food allergies, back when I first started. Now it is simple to me. So much of life is like that.
Kid A is wearing his blue jammies with the feet. YaYa calls them her slippery jammies, and slips and slides all over the floor like a fish in them. I love Kid A's eyelashes. Last night when I got home I felt exuberant, like I could float away because of the love that supports me. We played the game again, where we talk about what we like about each other, all piled on to the love seat like puppies. YaYa said that she loves the hugs that both of her brothers give. Kid A said that he likes that YaYa is so bee-youtiful. Leafy ran back and forth.
A few things made me feel better, after I wrote that last post. I still mean all of what I wrote, and sorrow wells up in me, but some things sustain me.Â
Your kind comments. I am so blessed to have you as my friends, reading my words and giving your kind input and understanding. Sometimes all I need is sympathy, you know? You know.
And then, I went to visit with some dear friends, and they showed me photos of the two lovely places that we will most likely end up living in, in India. One is mountainous and lovely, in the North. And one is beachy and tropical, in the South. And it hit me. I've been wanting to go back to India for so, so long. And finally, we are going. I felt wave after wave of happiness wash over me as I looked at the photos. Because India, also, is one of my homes. And I am returning.
My heart is busy storing up days that tell of God's faithfulness to me. How He stretches the line of my life like a ribbon, fitting it around the various curves and over the various mountains, lining it up in pleasant places, even in the midst of sorrow.Â
Today, we have even more evidence that we are being tenderly cared for than yesterday. So much of life is like that.Â
And now I have to look after the needs of this patient boy who is sitting beside me, the one with the nose that is so perfect I would like to have it framed.
Kid A sits beside me, he scratches his neck, where he still gets eczema, from time to time, especially if I am not careful enough with his diet. I remember how overwhelmed I was by feeding three kids with food allergies, back when I first started. Now it is simple to me. So much of life is like that.
Kid A is wearing his blue jammies with the feet. YaYa calls them her slippery jammies, and slips and slides all over the floor like a fish in them. I love Kid A's eyelashes. Last night when I got home I felt exuberant, like I could float away because of the love that supports me. We played the game again, where we talk about what we like about each other, all piled on to the love seat like puppies. YaYa said that she loves the hugs that both of her brothers give. Kid A said that he likes that YaYa is so bee-youtiful. Leafy ran back and forth.
A few things made me feel better, after I wrote that last post. I still mean all of what I wrote, and sorrow wells up in me, but some things sustain me.Â
Your kind comments. I am so blessed to have you as my friends, reading my words and giving your kind input and understanding. Sometimes all I need is sympathy, you know? You know.
And then, I went to visit with some dear friends, and they showed me photos of the two lovely places that we will most likely end up living in, in India. One is mountainous and lovely, in the North. And one is beachy and tropical, in the South. And it hit me. I've been wanting to go back to India for so, so long. And finally, we are going. I felt wave after wave of happiness wash over me as I looked at the photos. Because India, also, is one of my homes. And I am returning.
My heart is busy storing up days that tell of God's faithfulness to me. How He stretches the line of my life like a ribbon, fitting it around the various curves and over the various mountains, lining it up in pleasant places, even in the midst of sorrow.Â
Today, we have even more evidence that we are being tenderly cared for than yesterday. So much of life is like that.Â
And now I have to look after the needs of this patient boy who is sitting beside me, the one with the nose that is so perfect I would like to have it framed.
in Inside My Head, Kid A
Inside My Head, Kid A 
Reader Comments (5)
Sister, when are you coming to Vancouver?
I am greatly anticipating getting to know you and your well written of family like I should.
I feel really good about reading you blogs, they are really nice, I kinda get a little movie in my head of you all, voices and faces.
Thanks
Matty and I have your blog page as our start up page now. So we dont miss a thing.
Love you.
Lara
Boo Hoo! That's how I feel! But it is wonderful that you are returning to a place you love.
Isn't He good? It's always funny to me how wild the swing from dispair to overwhealming joy can be- and how fast it happens sometimes. That's why Psalm 42:4-6 speaks so well to me in the sad times. Certainly having an idea of where you will be makes it all feel less desparate. Knowing what's next- where you're to be planted. How wonderful for you! Excited for what the Father has planned for you in your new home...either in the mountainous north OR the warm beachy south.
hi, i haven't actually commented very often even though i read your blog regularly, checking it every weekday with anticipation... i think the reason i don't comment very much is cuz so often what you write creates such emotion in me and i'm not sure i can let it out without a dam breaking... you're so vulnerable and real and personal and that is something i want, but struggle with revealing myself to anyone other than a trusted few... but i think it needs to happen...
anyways, i just wanted you to know. to know that what you write does hit home and is beautiful and rings true.
Today I was cleaning my bedroom closet. Angry that it could become so cluttered in only a year and realizing that it was never neat. Just a time capsules of boxes from Seattle. I tore box after box apart and joyed in the little treasures that I found. A black light from college, hair from #1 sons first cut and a box of clothing that I wore just before we moved.
I'm struggling to make this new place a home. It's foriegn in ways that no foreign country have ever been. Such an outsider in my own country. Realizing slowly that it may never be home and coming to turns that I have to make the apartment the home that my children need.
I'm thankful that you got to sit with a little person in the incense. I need to make sure that I do that soon.