Saturday
Apr212007
Swimming through
April 21, 2007
Sometimes a break is in order. Life has continued, for me, full speed ahead, and I'm sorting through my emotion-box, restacking and refolding. I think I have everything in order and then I wake up again, not wanting to get out of bed, and I realize, we're not through this, and I need to hold my hand again to get through the day
I've been eyeing my computer every time I pass it, but my routines are scattered and confused, and I haven't been able to write. It seems to be a law in my house that my kids become incredibly needy if I'm on the computer while they're awake, and I usually write in the early hours of the morning when they're still sleeping. These hours have been unavailable to me lately, and I haven't been pushing myself.
I've been taking a break. And I guess I still am. Thanks for understanding. By the way, I loved your weekend words. They warmed me and I felt like you brought me right into your experiences.Â
I've been eyeing my computer every time I pass it, but my routines are scattered and confused, and I haven't been able to write. It seems to be a law in my house that my kids become incredibly needy if I'm on the computer while they're awake, and I usually write in the early hours of the morning when they're still sleeping. These hours have been unavailable to me lately, and I haven't been pushing myself.
I've been taking a break. And I guess I still am. Thanks for understanding. By the way, I loved your weekend words. They warmed me and I felt like you brought me right into your experiences.Â

I write short things here.
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Reader Comments (6)
It's good for you to take as much time as you need. Bless you my friend.
I'm so sorry that you are struggling/grieving which is okay! Give yourself that time without feeling guilty!
Kids are always needy when mother is doing something besides being focused on them - whether you're on the phone or reading a book - it never fails - a little face usually pops into your peripheral vision! I remember the days of "mom's on the phone - let's do everything we know we're not supposed to be doing right now - she cannot reach us" (before cordless phones) so I had very short phonecalls.
Be still! Rest! Knit! and all the other things that bring you joy even right now.
Yes! Your mom's right, you know. (Aren't they usually so?) No apologies needed. Just keep on keepin' on and please know we're praying for you still.
It is wonderful that you recognize that you need the break, and are taking it. God Bless.
Hugs~~~I haven't been able to check on my links, etc as much as in the past and my heart is hurting for you, as I have just read the last few posts.
Your words are incredible. My daughter, Sara, is in that beautiful and perfect place.... your words to your baby echoed back at me and I can't express how thoroughly you captured these emotions, hopes.
Be gentle with yourself and continue to let people love you. Their ways may not always be the way you need that day, but their love will not be in vain. Chrissy
I echo the others---take all the time you need. Be tender with yourself. The aftermath of loss is confounding. It was for me. Heck, it still is sometimes.
Take care.