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Friday
Mar142008
Looking again
March 14, 2008
I need to find myself for a few days. My well is dry. I'm not sure of who I am, really, in all this muddle. In the blog world. In the writing world. I think I've just dried up, which could be expected, I guess, after day after day spent in the house packing.
I'll be back after the weekend, I think. If I locate me anywhere out there. Maybe some river will amble along and flood its banks beside me, and I'll be carried away. Maybe the dryness will be overwhelmed by the Spring, or the glimpse of sky I get through my front window.
Maybe I'll get my writing self esteem back. It's been taking a beating. I'm hearing all kinds of insidious whisperings these days, can't quite fight them off.
I need some grace. I would drink an ocean of it, if I could hold it all in.
I'll be back after the weekend, I think. If I locate me anywhere out there. Maybe some river will amble along and flood its banks beside me, and I'll be carried away. Maybe the dryness will be overwhelmed by the Spring, or the glimpse of sky I get through my front window.
Maybe I'll get my writing self esteem back. It's been taking a beating. I'm hearing all kinds of insidious whisperings these days, can't quite fight them off.
I need some grace. I would drink an ocean of it, if I could hold it all in.
Reader Comments (12)
Today I read a quote on Momma Love's site that "writing isn't good or bad, it is just interesting or not and the interest depends on the reader."
I'm neither a writer nor a woman, but I read, and I love and live with a woman... I seems to me that the sensitivity and passion and vulnerability that is required of a writer makes a volatile mix with pregnancy. Or moving. Or car crashes. Or house flattenings. etc. You will be fine again. And even a dry riverbed can have a beautiful story. I read a comment about the subtle difference between reputation and character. Subtle, but very important to keep in mind. mark
You must miss your river! You must miss your trees! You must be tired of all the packing.... it's only natural to feel all dried up. So many changes in a short time.... You must feel overwhelmed!
Take some time to refresh yourself when you can. He leads me beside the still waters, he restores my soul....
You are amazing!!! what you accomplish in a day is awesome.
another favorite of mine - be still, cease striving and know that I am God.
Don't listen to the whisperings. You are a beautiful writer. Just keep going forward.
I hope you feel better about it soon -
I'll miss your words.
I'll be here with open ears (and eyes) when you come back.
Happy, fruitful wanderings.
I read this post over at One Thing that filled me up again with a newborn and an 18 mos old and a 3 yo this week, perhaps it will let your banks overflow as well. Not to mention that she's baking child #12, so I snapped out of my weariness long enough to stand in awe of her. Then I took a nap. :)
http://beautifulheritage.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/re-named/
Listen to the whispers suggesting more rest. Those speak of truth and wisdom and discernment and the character of our God who rests. (As much as you can under the circumstances...) Ignore insidious whisperings of any kind. They lie.
Dude....right now you're whole being is a blessed vehicle for life and it takes so much strength and courage that God has surely gifted you with!!!
I'm moving across the country in a week, tossing stuff left right and centre, packing and struggling to even make dinner and all i have to do to help me stay a little sane is read this blog to realize I'm a total woosie, and embrace the goddess in you that knows no bounds...
to see how much you accomplish here in this nifty blog world.. this awe inspiring human-ness
let the floodgate's open and go for the ride, it might massage your soul
i think a little Michael Franti song is in order,
'pray for grace'
now go smell your husband
Take some time to do something fun. Go to museum. Go for a drive, and take your notebook that is when all my ideas come to me.
Go somewhere new and exciting even if it just a new coffee shop.
Hang in there it will come back.
xoxo nita
hope you find a well spring of renewal, a lovely walk to regenerate you. try not to doubt your words, we all like them so very much. kisses from little ones can do wonders to a weary mama (mam-to-be too).
I am not sure how I came across you, but I am so glad I did. I have to share this quote with you:
"Grace isn't a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal. It's a way to live."
— Jackie Windspear
It is evident to me from the way you speak of your children, your husband and your life, that you do live this way. An outsider's perspective, but hopefully perspective nonetheless.
You are grace!
Tamara