1. I stopped my oldest son today, (oldest is a deceptive word; I shall endeavor to remember that he still is only six) because he was obviously trying to hide something from me as he went into the bathroom. When he reluctantly opened his hand to show me what was inside, there was a kidney bean nestled on his palm. (!) Later I found the little family of peas that he was bringing the kidney bean to join, on the bathroom floor, in a bowl, floating in water, surrounded by peas and salt.
(He's trying to make things grow. A little futile with the peas, since they were roasted masala peas. He may have fared better with the bean.)
When things like this happen, I:
a) Remember that he is a blossoming scientist and that I only need to encourage him to wait for a cue to begin the experiments involving beans and water and peas all over the bathroom floor.
b) Find it hysterical when I demand to see what is in his hand and see something as meek as a solitary pink kidney bean. So harmless! So beanlike!
c) Wonder how on earth I landed the job of mother. I'm still twelve.
2. Whew! Points within points! I cut my sister's hair tonight and it gave me creative joy like ice sculpting would if I had ever actually tried it. (I haven't.)
3. There are two things that I am not permitted to do, now that I am married to my Superstar Husband, who never puts his foot down about anything. They are:
a) Cut myself a mullet. (I don't want a big one, just a little tiny short-hair space at the front of my head.)
b) Wear leggings.
Tattoos, ear-stretching, body-building, tap-dancing. All would be fine. No mullets and no leggings, no negotiating. I can handle that.
4. My neighbor gave me a bag of cashew fruit. I have NO idea what to do with it. It appears to be inedible, while still being the juiciest fruit ever (in Reneé's words). I'm also quite flabbergasted to see that each piece of fruit, while being the size of a small green pepper, contains ONE cashew nut. HOW DO THEY GET SO MANY CASHEWS ALL THE TIME? Seriously, the world seems to be full of cashew trees.
5. Leafy walked over to me while I was working on an email today, holding a plate with three cups balancing on it.
"I got you some water-milk!" he said, handing me one of the cups that was precariously sliding around on his "tray".
I looked into the cup. It appeared to be water with a few drops of milk inside. "Wow," I said. "Thanks so much!" And then I took a sip.