Friday
Aug072009
The wet wet
August 7, 2009
It looks like we are in for a wet month. (When I spoke of the monsoon not coming I was speaking of Delhi and the areas around, not here.) The monsoon has taken it's real grip now, with tight fists and claws clambering up the mossy stones on our hill. Everything is green! Bright, shameless green. There are ferns throwing themselves up under the trees in the forest, climbing right up onto the trees themselves and swarming over the trunks. Moss growing between the stones and on the stones, which makes for careful climbing down the hills. The corn on the terraces is taller than us now, and we walk in a narrow hallway, gently sprayed by the water that has collected on the tassels.
It would be a very green view, if we could see it. Instead we are wrapped in a dense fog, almost all the time. It clears up and then reasserts itself very quickly, and we are busy running in and out putting the clothes out to dry. I have been washing the mold off different parts of the kitchen every day.
We compensate by turning the lights on even in the day, playing loud music and card games, reading in a pile. We can still snuggle, because though it is wet, it is not hot.
When I think of how afraid I was, just a year ago, how displaced and terrified I felt, it is like a page turning. I look at me now, weaving between cornstalks and sitting in auto rickshaws, and a whole different kind of light floods the inside of me. I am so thankful. I have come through fear into rest, and trusting God has been the only way through. It's another story to add to my stones of remembrance.
It would be a very green view, if we could see it. Instead we are wrapped in a dense fog, almost all the time. It clears up and then reasserts itself very quickly, and we are busy running in and out putting the clothes out to dry. I have been washing the mold off different parts of the kitchen every day.
We compensate by turning the lights on even in the day, playing loud music and card games, reading in a pile. We can still snuggle, because though it is wet, it is not hot.
When I think of how afraid I was, just a year ago, how displaced and terrified I felt, it is like a page turning. I look at me now, weaving between cornstalks and sitting in auto rickshaws, and a whole different kind of light floods the inside of me. I am so thankful. I have come through fear into rest, and trusting God has been the only way through. It's another story to add to my stones of remembrance.

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Reader Comments (9)
I like that phrase "stones of remembrance". I have accumulated a sizeable pile too.
In the New Testament a man with a withered hand came to Jesus for healing. Jesus told him to put forth his hand--the very thing the man was unable to do.
Instead of saying 'but master, this is the thing I cannot do, this is impossible", he responded in obedience--he willed to do the asked thing.
The result? The man was able to do stretch forth his hand, because Jesus provided the way via healing of his hand. The hoped for thing came to pass...as he attempted to put forth his hand he was given the ability to do so. He went away whole. Had he refused, he'd have gone away the same as he came--with his infirmity.
Our obedience in going the way the Lord would have us go in spite of our fears delivers the faith we need to do so. We step out in faith--not blind faith, but faith in One who is able, believing that he will make a way.
You have been obedient in your walk in India and the enabler has enabled you to do the hard stuff, to continue in obedience. And the trail behind you--the trail with the 'stones' which you can pile up in remembrance--is the seen part; the trail ahead--is the unseen....and each step you take --in obedience to the Master--is the substance and evidence of your belief, i.e. faith. Each step taken in obedience demonstrates you are trusting that you will arrive safely, in spite of your fears and evidence to the contrary.
Your hope in that which you are not able to 'see' is dependent upon your obedience and faith. As evidenced by your pile of stones, your faith is increasing and you have been obedient to your master.
Rae,
I've just started reading, can't remember how I arrived. But thank you; thank you for poetically describing such simple things as moss and stalks and the moments we look past. Thank you.
Found your blog and I love reading it. Worlds apart (I am in Florida), but enjoying your journey. You can read my blog, thereynoldsnation.blogspot.com if you like. Blessings, Allison
I wanted to save this to read until I was home but I'm so glad I didn't. Now when I drive home I will savor the green that surrounds my home in Indiana.
Thank you Rae. Your words are a treat.
Thanks, I needed this today. As time draws nearer I ping pong between excitement and fear. Like hebews 11, it is such a comfort to listen and hear others journey's. Your post reminds me of the picture I had of your family being wrapped up in a blanket for this season.
beautiful as always
I resonate with the fear/trust thing, so much. Like walking on water, we need to keep our eyes on the One in order to keep on walking.
Love you...can't wait to hug you soon.
i just wanted to let you know how much i enjoy your "blog"!
i don't think anyone knows, but i've been despondent since my youngest left for college. i used to be the one who would tell you "i just let the Lord control my emotions" or" you just have to decide to have a positive attitude!" i had no idea what depression was. now i am thoroughly humbled!
victoria
oh, one more thing - i like those bendy carrots!
You have your stones, and I have my "faith chair" but the end result is that you realize over and over again how faithful our Father is. We all tend to forget and often have to relearn it, but it's nice to have the stones or the faith chair to remember.
You are growing, and He is leading you into new areas all the time. It's true you are the person you were a year ago... I love Dinah's response, and the reminder about being obedient and walking forward in faith.